They say it happens when you get older. I looked into the mirror and my dad was looking back at me. . I can also see my grandmother in my eyes. 

At first it made me feel sad. Gone is the clear, smooth skin that I never even noticed until it was gone.  And no amount of money can bring it back.

Just yesterday I looked down at my hands. They are my mother’s hands and also, the hands of my grandmother.  When did that happen? Gone are the straight, strong fingers that I never bothered to notice and cherish. I guess I never really believed that someday they’d change.

So here I sit, at a crossroads. And I ponder what happens from here? Since this is the youngest I’ll ever be, today…right now….it stands to reason that this is the best it’s going to be.   So, shall I focus on what is lost or on what is gained? One choice makes me feel bad, and the other makes me feel good. I know which choice I’m making.  Feeling bad does not change one thing, except that I would have given my joy away on this only November 30, 2020 that I’ll ever have.

So yes, gone is my youth, at least physically. Gone are my young hands. And as much as I’d love to, sometimes, I can’t go back.  So I look, again, at my hangs, and I understand. My hands have held my new born babies and now have held their babies, too. These hands have made rv roofs and trumpets and they’ve painted and cleaned home after home. They have cooked and repaired and made beds with precision. My hands are been cut and bruised and burnt and still they are ready for more.

My hands have caressed and expressed my every emotion. They have created magic in glass and have played the guitar and insisted that I sing.  They have drawn the bow over the strings of my viola and understood as I wept from the beauty of it all.   They have laid sod, hug holes, thrown rock, served coffee and made Christmas cookies. They have clapped so loudly for things that are right and have been clenched in fury and rage when the world is unfair and unjust. And they have come together for prayer in thanks and gratitude. I’d say it was a fair trade. Wisdom and delight today leaves in it’s wake wonderful memories of my youth. And this day holds all possibility. I think I’ll go after it. Blessings to you.